Usually I take a lot of time making New Year's Resolutions every year (mostly enjoying the artsy part of writing them with color pens), but this year I made it pretty short and simple. I knew I have a big audition season coming up this winter (five trips to NYC and a few other cities) and I wanted to stick with just a few words to get through the challenging time. One of them was to "go for it"-- for example, if I want to participate in a certain summer festival, no matter how high the level is, then apply and do whatever I need to do to be ready for the auditions and prepare to be someone who is ready to attend it. Another one was "less is more." When I began making time and energy for things I really want, being able to say "no" to things I can't commit to at the moment, good things seem to happen. I feel more focused and free...happy! Lately, I have been thinking a lot about "being in the present" and "trusting yourself." I feel these are obvious good wisdom that are stated frequently but it's easier said than understood or done. This year thus far I think I got better at doing "fully focus." When I'm playing a piece of music, I only focus on performing that, when I'm taking a break, I relax and not think about things on my agenda (harder said than done), when I'm working on a paper, I clear my mind and just write the paper, and when I'm talking with a friend, I'm fully engaged in the conversation (that I've been doing pretty well I think...not having a smartphone has advantages too!)...When you throw yourself fully in something, the results may be what you want or not, but there are zero regrets, and even when you get exhausted afterward, it's a refreshing and satisfying kind of exhaustion. Also, since you are fully engaged in doing it and can feel that you've done everything you could do, you're free from the results. Besides, the fact you're "fully engaged" would more likely shows your passion without forcing...whether for auditions or performances or many other things in life. You really have zero competition in the world so it's easier to trust yourself when you just do it, being fully committed and being in the moment. This audition season I took several intensive summer festival auditions besides auditions for D.M.A. Between now and the start of January, I can really feel that I've grown tremendously from getting through the challenging time. In the midst of preparing for big auditions, I traveled a lot (for auditions), got winter flu, sometimes had midterm paper due on my audition date, other day getting food poisoning before interviews, and showed up to all of my responsibilities besides my own auditions. In the middle of the (or, maybe because of the) craziness, I've learned to focus on taking care of myself well no matter where, focus on polishing music each time, and many other happy things happened, like going back to my alma matar, seeing old faces, and meeting new faces. I was so tired, but I was so happy at the same time, and I am so grateful to many people in my life including my teacher and many other mentors and wonderful friends around me for their continuous inspiration, warm support, and positive affirmation! I'll end today with two quotes that have cheered me throughout my recent adventures.
“The universe rewards action. Successful people take action towards a known outcome.You can't think about it.You have to do it—and you don't do it for a week or a month. You do it until. Until you get what you want." (Phillip McGraw)
“The world is like a mirror; frown at it, and it frowns at you. Smile and it smiles, too.” (Herbert Samuels)
“The universe rewards action. Successful people take action towards a known outcome.You can't think about it.You have to do it—and you don't do it for a week or a month. You do it until. Until you get what you want." (Phillip McGraw)
“The world is like a mirror; frown at it, and it frowns at you. Smile and it smiles, too.” (Herbert Samuels)